Testing…1, 2, 3

“Because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Allow perseverance to finish its work, so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.”

James 1: 3-4

It was good news or so I thought.

“Well,” he said, “the test results showed good news for one area. "But..." nothing good ever follows a ‘but’. “We see something else and we want to refer you to another specialist.” My hopes were dashed. This back and forth dance I was doing with doctors wasn’t over just yet. But I was tired. After he said those words, the rest of the conversation was kind of a blur. This thing was now consuming my thoughts so much that I couldn’t concentrate on much else for the rest of the day. Another specialist! I felt helpless, unsure. What did this mean? Lord. I don’t want to be sick! Lord, please I’m a mom and a wife. All these thoughts rushed through my head as I proceeded to do the only thing I could do, vacuum. Yes, vacuum. I needed to do something worthwhile; needed to be in control of something. Pushing the machine across the floor I began to lament loudly. “Lord, you know what I’m going through right now. All of the other areas of my life where I am struggling. And yet I seem to always find myself in this place. What is with all of these tests?”

In my mind, I meant the medical tests. But in that instant, God spoke to me. Over the course of my adult life, I have had many phone calls like the one that day. Many tests, follow-up appointments and nervous moments bookmarked by tears and anxious thoughts. But those times were faith tests more than anything. Just like now. By the grace of God, those tests resulted in either positive resolution or diagnosis that God had prepped me to handle. Some were life-changing. But none of them were life ending. Proven, God whispered, by the fact that I  am still here to tell the story.

If you are reading this, then you too are still here. In spite of all of the challenges, setbacks and tests. And be comforted by the fact that God is right there with you as you lament, struggle and overcome those things designed to fortify your faith and not weaken it.

#Sickness #Healing #Faith #James #Tests